Visited Orphanage (Not Katie Lin's Orphanage)

2/25/05 (a.m.)

Last night KL slept 8-1/2 hours straight. Yea! However, Ben was up about three or four times throwing up. He seems better now. He is drinking Gatorade (which we brought from home) and is resting in bed right beside me. Hopefully in a few hours we can try some oatmeal or rice congee if he has an appetite. Thanks for all your prayers for Ben. He really appreciates that.

Sonya, Grandmother, and KL just left for breakfast. Drew and I will take the second shift. I'll try to post something later today, including pic's, so you'll have something to wake up to.

Jeff, Sonya, Drew, Ben, Katie Lin and Grandmother


2/25/05 (p.m.)

I spent 30 of the saddest minutes of my life today at the Nanchang SWI Orphanage. It really doesn’t matter what I write at this point, words cannot capture what we experienced there. The word “heartache” has taken on a new meaning for me. I’ve never been to a place that was full of abandoned children. I’ve heard many of you who have been to China, Moldova, Romania, Guatemala, and other mission trips describe your visits to orphanages before, but nothing could have prepared me for the emptiness I felt in my heart for these children.

Our guide did not tell us where we were going until she picked us up at the hotel. Fortunately, Ben did not go. He stayed with Grandmother and slept off his sickness. He has such a sensitive little heart. I don’t think he could have handled it. Drew went with me, Sonya, Katie Lin and our friends, the Browns, from Birmingham (aka Emma’s parents).

We were met by the orphanage director who seemed very friendly and eager to show us around. I was allowed to video tape the outside of the facility, but not the inside. In a selfish way, I’m glad I don’t have a visual reminder of what I saw. The first room we visited was full of older pre-schoolers to maybe 6- or 7-year-olds, most of whom were special needs children. As soon as the door opened, a little boy ran to Sonya and gave her a huge hug. He wrapped his arms around her legs like she was his long lost mommy. At the same time, the other children gathered around us, grabbing us and loving on us like new toys. It was overwhelming! One little boy grabbed me by the hand and took me to his bunk to show me where he slept. He was very proud of his little corner of the room. Another little girl told Sommer Brown (in Chinese of course) that she was the big sister. Several of the others continued to watch a video in the play room without paying us much attention.

The room was very dirty and the odor very strong (in a bad way, of course). I hate to admit it, but I did not want to stay long. It was pretty nauseating. We were told that the bunk beds these children slept in were very nice, probably even better than what our little girls were accustomed to. I thought, “She must be joking.” But apparently she was serious. The filth, the mold, the bacteria that lived in the room would scare a germ-freak (like Sonya or Sommer) to death.

I thought the worst must be over, then she took us to the room where they took care of the abandoned little babies. We were led to a window, similar to a nursery window at a hospital or church. We could see fourteen little infant beds inside, all made of what appeared to be aluminum or stainless steel (you know, the typical institute-looking stuff). Inside the beds were these very thick papoose type bundles with babies inside. They asked us if we wanted to go in and look around and we jumped at the chance, except for Gary, who stayed outside the window with little Emma.

I wish I could describe my emotions accurately, but I’m not sure I’ve ever felt anything like it before. Sonya and Sommer started weeping immediately. I was doing all I could as “a man” to maintain my composure, but it was one of the toughest emotional battles of my life. The room was totally silent. Each of the babies literally looked dead – no tears, eyes closed, totally still, motionless, all wrapped up in huge blankets with only their faces showing. Attached to each of the little beds was a clipboard with the name given each baby, their estimated birth date, and the date they were abandoned/found.

The first face I saw when I peered over into one of the beds was that of a little girl, appx. six weeks old, who had cleft lip, but it did not take away from her beauty. The rest looked perfectly healthy, some with very little hair, some with a lot; some very pale, some with a lot of color, some with fat little faces, some with very thin. The thought of a parent abandoning their baby has always bothered me, but I guess I’ve always tried to ignore the thought as much as I could, now here I was face to face with the reality of this tragedy. I could not ignore it any longer. These little babies’ faces will haunt me for the rest of my life. It affected all of us. Drew asked several questions on the way back to the hotel about the future of these little boys and girls. I’m so glad he went with us. We need to allow our children to see the realities of this cruel world sometimes in order to learn the real value of life.
I’m so glad I’ve come to understand the sovereignty of God more and more over the last few years; otherwise, I would have asked the same question that has been asked by so many before…”How could a loving God allow this to happen to these children?” However, after the joy that Katie Lin has brought to my life in these four brief days that I’ve spent with her so far, I’m convinced that one of the reasons is so He can allow a few of these children the privilege of being adopted by families who will love them and introduce them to a God who has a special plan for their lives. I plead with you all, if you are able, please pray about adopting one of these little orphans as your own. Give them a chance to live a good life in a free country with a family who will spoil them rotten.

Sorry for the lengthy, not so pleasant post. I’m sure all of you are more anxious to hear about Katie Lin than me pouring my heart out about the abandoned children of China. I will try to spend a few minutes re-adjusting my thought process and post more about our princess a little later.

Jeff